Film One
Turning on the Connection System
{52 minutes}
Turning on the Connection System
Or, Why Turning on the Connection System is the most important thing you can do for your wellbeing
This is my favorite section. This is the beating heart of our work. For 99.9 percent of human history, the way that we lived was all about connection. The function of culture, says deep nature awareness teacher and connection phenomenologist Jon Young, is to connect. It’s very purpose it to connect us to ourselves, one another, and the living world. At the level of neural circuitry, the level of biology, there exists a Connection System, a component of our Autonomic Nervous System, which was identified by Dr. Stephen Porges, the developer of the Polyvagal Theory. He calls this system the Social Engagement system. This biological system wires together the neural regulation of the face and voice with the heart and the breath, and brings us into physiological regulation and attuned relationship with others when we feel safe. It is the neurological architecture of connection. The Connection System is, biologically, the root of health and well-being. The purpose of our work is to bring online and stabilize this connection system as the physiological baseline for humans. Ancestrally, bringing this system online and stabilizing it was the job of culture. We can conceptualize culture, and the evolved nest that Dr. Narvaez speaks of, as the set of practices whereby the connection system is evoked and stabilized. Culture is a set of practices that contain neural exercises for teaching humans to become baselined in this Connection System. Each cultural element, each Restorative Practice that we study, is connected, in some way, to this objective.
It is important to note that the doorway to turning on the Connection System is an embodied felt sense of safety. To make this abundantly clear: In order to be healthy, you have to feel safe. Take this in, because we live in a culture that inequitably distributes safety, and this is creating both a public health and a human rights EMERGENCY. We have taken a basic human right (safety) and turned it into a privilege, one that those who possess it take for granted: so deeply that they don’t know it is the foundation of their own well-being. To have access to safe drinking water, to have enough food, to live in a neighborhood where you are not afraid you will be shot, to not be aggressed by the police: these are rights that have become privileges in our highly unequal society. To be able to walk down the street without being harassed because of your gender, or gender presentation, your race, or your religious beliefs. For many of us, safety was never promised. And so, let’s start here, because safety may not be generally available. Even for those to whom it is perhaps more available, based on economics or social location, Dr. Vincent Felitti’s landmark Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES) study has shown us that more than two thirds of Americans have experienced early adversity. Early adversity is the rupture of safety. We have to repair safety to be able to access connection, and we have to access connection in order to be well. But how do we do this repair work?
Our recognition that this work of repairing adversity and turning on connection has not been categorically developed led to the creation of the Restorative Practices model. This is necessary because, ancestrally, in all indigenous and traditional cultures there were bodies of restorative practice in place to bring the people back when they were deviated from connection. These cultures knew that safety and connection were the baseline, and that when it was disrupted, we had to actively engage in practices to bring it back. The modern world has forgotten this. At the heart of these restorative practices is this imperative: repair adversity so that we can turn the connection system back on.
There are myriad ways to do this, and all of them involve relationship and awareness. We can begin with ourselves, we can begin with one another, or we can begin with the living world. Jon Young invites us to ask, What do we feel connected to, and how did we get to be that way with that thing? If you feel connected to a pet, or a place, or to your deepest sense of self, how did that happen? What was the pathway to connection? There was intent. There was time, and intimacy, moments of curiosity. There was presence. There was contact. Rupture and repair. If we look at the pathway to connection, we see that it unfolds and deepens gradually, through experiences, through moments of care. It is spontaneous, unplanned, creative. The San bushmen of the Kalahari talk about Building Ropes, about moments of recognition. Moments of seeing one another as individuals. Moments when the Other becomes real to us.
We have to set out to connect, to break through the veil of disconnection.
“How can the prisoner reach outside except by thrusting through the wall?”
—Herman Melville
In the film on this page, we explore why 60-80% of doctor visits to primary care physicians are stress related, the concept of deviation from an ancestral baseline, Dr. Darcia Narvaez, PhD’s concept of the Evolved Developmental Niche, indigenous child-rearing practices, neuro-embrology, Dunbar’s number, the Philadelphia Hospital study, stress physiology, Dr. Paul Maclean MD’s Triune Brain model, the origins of Dr. Peter Levine, PhD’s Somatic Experiencing modality, and reflect on our relationship with technology.
Related Practices:
This practice is related to just about everything in the Restorative Practices model, and is the film with which we generally begin our classes. It is deeply connected to The Origin Story. It is deeply connected to Building Ropes, and to Tracking. It is deeply connected to 3 Steps: Assess, Down-Regulate, and Connect. It is connected to Hacking Your Connection System and Feeding your Confidence. It is related to Turning Your Nervous System into Your Ally. It is related to the Relationship between Immunity and Stress. It is related to the Daisy Model of Regulation. See The Art & Science of Connection. See The Science of Safety. See Becoming a Real Human Being. When we delve into connection, we are learning to understand the Shape of our Yearning for Relatedness. This ignites our natural vitality. It stimulates the development of Healthy Relationships. It helps us welcome the stranger, and unlearn racism. It connects us once again to Gratitude.Video: | Photography: Adobe Stock | Licensed from Pexels.com, used with permission.